There’s something so exciting about the fresh start a new year promises. We get excited about our new calendar/planner (or diary if you’re in the UK region). It’s the ultimate tabula rasa – a blank slate to create whatever we want. A chance to put the past behind us and move forward with renewed energy & motivation. To re-write anything that didn’t work in previous years.
So why does this energy & enthusiasm fizzle so quickly? Why do we start each January with enough fire to launch a rocket into space but run out of fuel before February 1st?
There are a few theories about the why – all idea and no action; you have to form new habits and that’s incredibly hard to do; deep down, we’re lazy creatures and prefer comfort over massive success… But today we’re going to work on the how, not the why. I’m going to show you a few techniques to fuel that fire all year long!
A New Kind Of Goal
Planners are exciting because they’re blank, they offer potential and promise. Once we start using them, some of that excitement fizzles. It’s like each pen stroke is diminishing the potential and turning it into harsh reality. So how do we maintain the excitement once reality sinks in? It starts with creating a new kind of goal. A goal that includes measuring success by what’s going on internally as well as externally.
For a full list of planners that I’ve personally used and recommended, jump over to Real To Ideal’s FB post for descriptions and links.
Too often, our goals are based on things that are out of our control or they don’t fulfill our true desires (and that causes conflict between what we think we want and what we really want where the latter is always the winner…)
So when it comes to creating a goal you can stick to, the most important first step is to check in with yourself – Does the end result of achieving this goal get me closer to what I REEEEEEEALLY want in life? How will achieving this goal make me feel? How will achieving this goal change my life? Is this the kind of change I truly desire?
For example – a LOT of biz owners create goals like, “I want to fill my schedule with paid clients” or “I want to bring in $25k by the end of the month.” But when we check in with how we would feel if we achieved those goals, we find resistance. Maybe filling our schedule with paid clients will leave us stretched too thin & exhausted or maybe we wouldn’t have time to market and bring on new clients, so once we finish with the first wave of clients, it’s months before we can regain the momentum needed to attract new clients. Or maybe if our schedule was full, we wouldn’t be able to devote as much time to each individual client and deep down we’re worried about the quality of the services we’d deliver. Having this kind of resistance will PREVENT us from achieving our goals!!
As you can see, it’s absolutely vital to make sure our heart and soul truly desire the outcome of achieving the goals we’re setting for ourselves. Once you’re confident that this is the right goal for you – body, mind & soul – it’s time to look at how much you can control and how much is dependent on external circumstances beyond your control. In the example of wanting to earn $25k in 30 days, you can’t really control whether someone else is willing to pay you money. The only thing you can control is how you show up, what you do with your time and who you reach out to. You can create the environment that allows people to pay you and makes it easy for them to pay you, but you can’t actually control whether they choose to pay or not.
But it’s not hopeless – there are an infinite number of things in your control! For example – you can create an offer that people will want to buy, you can make the sales copy totally juicy and make your offer sound like a no-brainer, you can promote your offer EVERYWHERE, every single day, you can do webinars, live videos and Q&A sessions, you can make the purchase decision really easy for your clients by setting up an online payment system and offering incentives for committing to a purchase, you can ask your spirit guides/God/Goddess/Creator/Universe for help reaching people, you can be in your best energy and let that ooze into everything you do so that people will want to work with you and SO MUCH MORE!!!!
In other words, you can commit to doing everything in your creative power to clear the path between you and your ideal clients so that they have an easy time finding you, getting to know and like you and then buying from you. You can commit to becoming the person who attracts $25k in 30 days by committing to do the work while maintaining a high vibe energy. And if you do all this, the money will start to flow. It still might not be $25k in 30 days, because there may be all kinds of other things standing in the way of your success – some of which you can control (resistance, mindset, offering the right thing for you AND your audience, etc.) and some which you can’t (FB algorithms, economy problems, internet outages that affect your website or sales page, people taking a break from social media and therefore never seeing all your promotions, etc.).
That’s why, the important goal is the one that will make you feel amazing, like you did your best and accomplished something incredible, even if the money wasn’t what you’d hoped for, even if no one else shows up, likes, comments or buys what you’re bringing to the table.
When it comes to goals like this, I like to make a list of what I’m willing to commit to, what I’m handing off to the Universe (because the U is my biz partner and has a to-do list of its own to complete each day) and then state the goal in the form of how I want to feel as I accomplish this list.
That way the goal becomes something like this: Be visible in the right places, in front of the right people so that I have the opportunity to make $25k in 30 days. As long as I show up and do the work, I’ll feel accomplished, I’ll feel successful and I’ll feel more professional in 30 days then I do now. If I make $25k or more in 30 days, I’ll know this was the right offer at the right time and I’m the right person to offer it. If I don’t meet that financial goal, I’ll know I need to reassess where the resistance/obstacle was.
Now, looking at that kind of goal, you can see how you might need to form new habits in order to achieve it. If $25k in 30 days was your norm, it wouldn’t be much of a goal. And if $25k isn’t the norm for you yet, then the habits you currently have aren’t going to produce the desired new results. (Definition of insanity… Doing the same thing and expecting different results…) And that leads us to the #2 reason people don’t keep New Year resolutions past February 1st. They don’t create the habits needed to accomplish the goal.
New Goal = New Habits
How do you become the person you want to be in 2017? How do you become that incredibly successful person who makes a TON of money, has abundant time for fun, play & self-care, who gets excited about logging into work every Monday and has epiphanies about work while she’s completely unplugged every weekend?
How do you show up as the fierce, feminine, empowered high-achiever who attracts success like butterflies to flowers?
By creating the same habits she would do everyday and incorporating them into your daily routine. What does she have for breakfast? When does she log into work? How many hours of sleep does she get each night? How much time does she devote to physical exercise, meditation, socializing, etc.? How does she measure her success – is it really based on money anymore or is there something more important?
More importantly – what does she think about? We all have invisible scripts that play on constant repeat in our head, over and over and over again. Some of us have success scripts that encourage us to ignore the naysayers, keep going, we’re doing important work, we are awesome, we’re successful, our dreams are attainable!!! And others have scripts that hold us back, that tells us we’re not good enough, we shouldn’t even bother, we’re going to fail eventually, our dreams our ridiculous, etc. Which version do you think your successful future self is listening to? This magnificent creature you’re striving to become – this butterfly – what does she think about? What does she tell herself? What kind of people does she follow online for inspiration? What’s on the walls of her office? What books does she read? These are alllllllll things you could start doing TODAY to become her.
You can choose which script you want to play and you can write it down & hang it in every room in your house. You can set an alarm on your phone to go off every hour with a reminder of this script and you can choose to repeat it like a mantra for one minute every time the alarm goes off. You can work it into all your marketing and FB posts. You can start embodying it, listening to it & living it until you see it in your sleep!
These invisible scripts are nothing more than habits – things you barely even think about because they’ve become second nature. Habits are what create who we are each day and how the world perceives us – by the actions we do consistently. So in order to reach a new goal, we need to create new habits that lead to that goal. Let’s look at your new year’s resolution or your 90-day goal – what habits will you need to create to achieve this goal?
We all know that forming new habits can be difficult. So it’s important to celebrate your commitment. Which is different than celebrating your victories (but not the same as every participant gets a star either!) Celebrating your commitment is like saying I want to exercise for 30 mins every day, but I know I don’t have what it takes to commit to that. I’m basically setting myself up for failure if I try to do 30 mins a day right now. So I’m going to start with 10 mins every day because I’d feel foolish if I didn’t stick to that. I KNOW I can commit to 10 mins a day for 30 days. Then, I’m going to increase it to 20 mins a day for 30 days. By the end of 60 days, I’ll be ready to increase it to 30 mins every day and it will be easier to stick to.
It’s ok to start where you are and commit to anything you know you can stick to. Just make sure you create milestones for when it’s time to level up so you don’t get lazy and stick to 10 mins a day when the goal is 30. Create a fixed point for when you will level up and then do it.
And of course, celebrate the hell out of your victory when you reach that first milestone!!!! You committed and you did it!! Now it’s time to level up AND celebrate!!!
If creating new habits and sticking to them is your biggest weakness, I recommend Primoz Bozic’s Ultimate Guide To Creating Bulletproof Habits ( it’s free, opt-in required, not a Real To Ideal freebie, but I used this years ago and got a lot out of it…)
Milestones, Accountability, Access To Help
Another reason many people ditch their new year’s resolutions before they even get past the first month is because they try to do it alone. We’re not wired to have the willpower needed to do this alone. Biology and evolution will work against you every time. Sure, maybe you can re-wire it with Navy Seal training. But since most of us don’t need to withstand torture and interrogation – we just need to be able to meet a simple business goal in 90 days – we’re better off working together.
Find an accountability partner, join a group where you can discuss your goals publicly, post your goals where others in your household or office can see them. Create milestones and celebrate them publicly when you reach them!
Remember that milestone we created in the last section – the part about celebrating every time you accomplish part one and it’s time to level up? Choose a reward that you’ll treat yourself to when you reach that milestone. Then, invite someone – friends, family, biz besties – to celebrate with you when the time comes. Now, you’ve got someone else holding space for you to reach your goal and go celebrate with you. And, someone else to answer to if you don’t reach your milestone! That alone should keep you motivated and making progress!
Another way to get online accountability:
When you join the Real To Ideal email list (the opt-in box is in the sidebar at the top of this page), you get access to the Toolbox which has a fabulous 90-Day Goal Worksheet that helps you start with the #1 goal you want to reach in 90 days and then breaks it down into monthly goals and weekly goals. It helps you recognize the resources you’ll need along the way and the milestones to celebrate as you go. (The worksheets are in that photo at the top of this post…) In addition to the worksheets, you can also get accountability and weekly prompts in the Real To Ideal Superstars FB group. This helps you stay on track, ask for help as needed, network with people who might have what you need to accomplish one of your weekly tasks and learn how to get back on track if you happen to fall off. Because let’s face it, life gets in the way and it’s more important to re-calibrate than it is to lose focus.
And of course, nothing beats working with a coach or mentor 1:1 or joining a group/mastermind program! Working on your specific goals and how to accomplish them with an expert who can help you uncover your deepest desires as well as any resistance or obstacles standing between you and success is the fastest and most reliable way to reach your biggest goals and wildest dreams. If you’re interested in exploring that option, drop me a line. I’d be happy to jump on a free Skype call with you or recommend other coaches I know who are more suited to the kind of help you’re looking for. (You can reach me anytime at: questions at realtoideal.com or read more about how I can help here.)
Another advantage of surrounding yourself with successful people is they will help you dream bigger, go after bigger goals, stay motivated, keep your energy high vibe and so much more!!! Being in groups – whether they be paid masterminds or free FB groups – with high vibe, successful people will raise your own frequency and will keep you on track towards your own goals. Being around people who are accomplishing a lot, showing up as the BEST they can be and shining their light as brightly as possible will help you do the same. Read more about why this is sooooooooo important to your own success here – Surround Yourself With Success on the RTI blog.
I hope you create MASSIVE Success in the New Year and that each year gets better and better and better as you live out your wildest dreams!
Remember to work fiercely this year, not frantically and let your light shine as brightly as possible!